Q. A brunette, a blonde and a redhead are all in
fifth grade. Who has the biggest tits?
A. The blonde, because she's 18.
Q: Why can't blondes be cattle ranchers? A: They can't keep their calves together!
Q. What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg? A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
Q. What did the blondes right leg say to the left leg? A. Nothing, they haven't met!
Q: What do you give the blonde who has everything? A: Penicillin.
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Pregnant Blonde Joke
A blonde, a brunette and a red head are sipping tea and discussing their pregnancies.The brunette says, "My baby's going to be a boy." The blonde asks, "How do you know?" The brunette says, Dirty Blonde Jokes - Jokes"Because when we did it, my husband was on top."
The red head then says, "My baby's going to be a girl." The blonde asks, "How do you know?" The red head says, "Because when we did it, I was on top."
The blonde starts crying hysterically. When her friends finally calm her down, they ask her why she was crying. The blonde says, "My baby's going to be a puppy.
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Q. What's the difference between butter and a blonde? A. Butter is difficult to spread.
Q: What is a blondes top speed? A: 68, when she gets to 69 she blows a rod.
Q: What did the blonde say when asked if she'd ever been picked up by
'the fuzz'? A: 'No. But I've been swung around by the tits.'
Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head? A. A brunette with bad breath.
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Blonde Lion Tamer
A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two young people show up. One is a good looking guy in his mid- twenties and the other is a gorgeous blonde about the same age.The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you both better be good or you're history. Here's your equipment - a chair, a whip, and a gun. Who wants to try out first?"
The girl says, "I'll go first." She walks past the chair, the whip, and the gun, and steps right into the lion's cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her, so she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body.
The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her ankles. He continues to lick her calves and rests his head at her feet.
The circus owner's mouth is on the floor. He remarks, "I've never seen a display like that in my life." He then turns to the young man and asks, "Can you top that?"
"No problem," replies the young man, "just get that lion out of the way."
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Q.What is a blonde's idea of safe sex? A. A padded dash
Q. What do a bleached blonde and a 747 have in common? A. They both have a black box.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A. You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell...she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car? A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.
Q) What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A) When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!
Q) What does a blonde say after sex? So, are you all on the same team?
Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? A. Pull the pin and throw it back.
Q)How does a blonde turn the light on after sex? A) She opens the car door.
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Thanks for sharing,
Kevin
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